THE CHRONICLES OF NONE PRESENTS:

AN IMAGINARY CONVERSATION WITH MYSELF
ON THE WAY HOME FROM WORK FOR ALL TO ENJOY.

Stardate: Unimportant
Space Vector: Unknown
Mission: Uncertain

And there it is. Somedays I feel like I’m on a crash course for death and taxes.
Well…taxes are the only certainty in life at this point – I’m not even sure about
death. For all I know, when people supposedly become ‘deceased’, they go to a
great party in Uptown Manhattan where the Martinis are free and the drugs are
all hydroponic-based. Any societal construct of this age, this fucking age we live
in, is hot air from a horse’s ass and disenfranchised at best.

I mean really, what is happening in that there Red, White and Blue?

When you think of life on a global scale, it all really points to the pinnacle landmass
of The United States of (H)America – where everyone truly wants to be. I know,
I know. Capitalist Regime, obviously. Pig-headed Nation, of course. But any key to
success and potential realization lies in the farcical, plastic paradise of (yes…I’m
going to say it) THE AMERICAN DREAM. On a circular logic level, that horrible,
horrible country is the main driving force of the world. Asia has the marketplace
and the population, yes, and the United Kingdom has music (for the most part) but
the U.S.’ers have the nukes, the money, the jobs, the resources (puppeted by Canada),
the tropics, the mountains, the power and ultimately control over all those other
unimportant aforementioned places. I think this is mostly due to the fact that other
countries have REAL and LEGITIMATE problems while the ‘U.S.ers’ have never
had any REAL or LEGITIMATE problems. I mean really, they’ve always had
someone else to blame!

WHO IS TO BLAME you ask?
Let’s see, well back when the U.S.ers’ moved into this globular blob, for the very first
time, there were those SAVAGE INDIANS to blame. And then, a spawn of the Indians
with a darker flesh (known today as African Americans) became the problem…but that
didn’t last long. They were sent to the fields to work their asses off so the U.S.ers’ didn’t
have to. And then, just when it seemed like that was all well and good and the Savage
Indians had moved to remote areas with little resources and the African Americans
submitted to the U.S.ers’, those dang Mexicans had to try and take back their ‘supposed’
land. Liars. Punchinello. He must have been on drugs. Hardcore MEXICAN drugs! And
so on we went, all the way through the cold war and the EVIL RED RUSSIANS who
tried to steal the U.S.ers’ nukes (making Communism obviously being dismantled here
as a mood point) until today when the blame is on…hey wait a sec…panic setting in…
sweat beading on brow…WHO DO THE U.S.ERS BLAME NOW? THEY INVADED ANOTHER
COUNTRY AND KILLED THOUSANDS FOR OIL! DOES NOT COMPUTE! THE BLAME
FORMULA HAS BEEN BROKEN!

…Oh well. I guess the Users, oops, I mean U.S.ers’ will have to find a new fit for the
formula other than themselves. Sheesh. It’s tough being Number One.

Usa.
USA.
US.
Us. United?
America.
Hamerica.
Glamerica.
U.S.ers’.
USERS.
Obesity.
The U.S. of A.
The U.S. of FUCKIN’ A.
…fuckin’ A.